Being a single mom isn’t a walk in the park, which is why it’s so important to cheer yourself on or celebrate the single moms in your life. Raising kids on your own takes immense strength and endless love. You deserve to uplift yourself and other single moms by celebrating these awesome moments in your life as a single mom.
1. You Can Break the Rules
Every parent sets rules for their kids, sometimes purposefully or unknowingly. It’s how your children learn what’s safe, ethical and age-appropriate. You know what’s best for your kids, but single moms sometimes get to let their families break the rules.
You redefine parenting whenever you decide it’s right for your children. If they do great on a test at school, you might have ice cream for dinner. They could conquer their fear of sleeping without a nightlight, so you turn on music and jump on the bed together for a few minutes. Everything is up to you, which makes life more fun occasionally.
2. You Set Strong Boundaries
Creating limits for yourself and your kids makes everyone better. Your children learn how to enforce their boundaries as they grow up by watching you, strengthening their sense of self and setting the foundations for healthy relationships. You also benefit because you quickly learn when to stand up for what you believe is best. That’s a courageous skill many people struggle with, so celebrate life as a single mom who knows the importance of maintaining boundaries.
3. You Get Exclusive Bonding Moments
People who raise kids with partners have to split their time. One parent might get more bonding opportunities than the other if their work schedule is lighter or they have fewer responsibilities outside the home. You get to enjoy every moment when you attend a birthday party at the public playground or decorate cookies for the holidays. Savor every second and celebrate getting the chance to experience them together.
4. Your Private Moments Are Yours
Relationships with romantic partners can be fulfilling, but they also require work. As a single mom without a live-in partner, you can go to bed feeling exhausted without finding the energy for late-night conversations or intimate moments. You don’t have to worry about putting on a pleasant face for a partner after your kids go to bed when you really just want to watch your favorite TV show. Spend that time with self-care activities instead, especially on National Single Mom’s Day.
5. You’ve Learned Independent Skills
Who needs a partner to change your oil or mow your lawn? You’ve already watched free YouTube videos to learn how to do those things independently. Being a single mom quickly teaches you how to be resourceful. You’ve learned to do incredible things you never thought were possible. That’s a skill worth recognizing.
6. You Control Your Family’s Future
When you want to move somewhere else, you don’t need to ask anyone’s input on which home you should buy. You get to decide where your children go to school, which vacations you take and how you spend the holidays. Those decisions might sometimes feel stressful, but you can make them however you want. There’s no partner to argue with or convince before choosing a path forward.
7. You’re Good Cop and Bad Cop
Partners often find themselves stuck in one of two roles — good cop or bad cop. It can make you feel trapped if you’re the parent always telling your kids no, but as a single mom, you get to be both. You enforce the rules in your home, but you’re also the fun mom who takes them to parks and movies. Not having to deal with the extra stress of parental roles is always a win.
8. You Have More Resources Than Ever
Consider what being a single mom might have been like 100 years ago. Now imagine it 50 years ago. You’re living in the best time to be a single mom because you can access more resources than any previous generation.
Instead of calling a neighbor to hope their teenager is free to babysit, you can jump online to find a sitter on websites or apps. You’re one Google search away from finding summer camps that suit your child’s unique interests or comparing school systems that fit their learning level. You can even order clothes during their growth spurt by tapping your phone. Being a single parent has never been easier, even when it feels challenging.
9. You Can Go on Dates
Long-term partners often lose the spark they once shared. Once their jobs take over their lives and family responsibilities multiply, people often feel stuck in their relationships. It’s no fun when your partner goes from being the love of your life to a disgruntled roommate.
You don’t have to deal with that because you can go on dates whenever you feel ready. You can experience tingly butterflies in your stomach on a first date or the flush of getting a compliment from a potential lover. Enjoy the freedom that comes with being single and celebrate that you get to love your incredible kids simultaneously.
10. You Inherently Deserve It
Moms constantly feel people and society telling them how to parent and what they’re supposedly doing wrong. No matter what anyone says, you deserve to celebrate yourself just because you’re doing your best. Being a single parent has its challenges and rewards. You deserve to cheer yourself on for giving your children all your time and effort.
Celebrate Your Life as a Single Mom
When Mother’s Day arrives this year, don’t leave yourself or any single moms you know out of the celebration. Being a parent shaped you into a courageous, strong, smart and inspirational person. You deserve some recognition for that — and so does every single mom.
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Ava Roman (she/her) is the Managing Editor of Revivalist, a women’s lifestyle magazine that empowers women to live their most authentic life. When Ava is not writing you’ll find her in a yoga class, advocating for her children, or doing her part to save the planet.